If You Don’t Like It, Stop Bitching About It – And Fix It!

"Dance a tune only you can hear, sing a happy song even if your sad, love your friends and family with all your heart. Tomorrow may never come so live for today."  Julie Hinkle

So this one day I was on the brink of tears.  You know… one of those little pity parties you have? I didn’t know why and I didn’t feel like there was anyone to really talk to. I just wanted to cry and I just wanted a hug and for no reason really.  Ever since the falling out of a friendship from someone I considered a sister and the death of another, I have yearned for the closeness of a friendship like I had before. 

Langdon was someone that I could talk to and never once did I feel judged. I could tell him the most humiliating stories and he would just laugh with me. I miss that kid dearly. And then the girl that I considered a sister, the one I was attached at to the hip to, the girl that I sang with, and have many memories with. We both changed and so did priorities and the friendship not only fell apart but shattered like a mirror dropped from 50 stories high. I mourned the loss of that friendship like I mourned the death of someone I cared for deeply.  In the 29 years of my life, I had never lost a friend so this cut deep.

Now, I’m not saying I do not have any friends. I have so many and I will be forever grateful for everyone in my life. I feel as though everyone in my life has contributed something to make me who I am today. Still, during my “poor me” session, I realized something…. It’s my own fault. It is and has been my own fault that I do not have that “best friend” that I can just call up for dinner or go to her house to hang out. It was my fault because I failed to put forth the effort into those friendships. I neglected those friendships and those people because I didn’t let them know how important they were to me. So I suppose I came to the conclusion that “you get what you give.”  

This little motto applies to almost everything. Life, school, work, kids, love, friendships… etc. If you put more of an effort into a relationship – you will get it back – sometimes tenfold! It seems as though I have applied this little rule into almost every part of my life except in friendships over the past year. And being the “Stop bitching and fix it” person that I am, I have come to the conclusion that I must put more of an effort into my friendships. I must stop whining and bitching about it and do something to change my thoughts.

Food for thought: On Friday, March 18, 2011, my friend made plans to come down for my birthday. He was planning on picking his girlfriend up from the airport that following weekend. On March 22, 2011, he died. We plan for tomorrow, next week, next month. But we never know if tomorrow, next week, or next month will come for us. We need to make sure that we tell those we care about how much we love them. Tell them... because they can’t read your mind.  Let them know that they are more important to you than they realize.

All My Love  ~  Sylba

o! and have you heard the new happy song?!?!?